How to Make Friends in Uni (Even as an Introvert)
You’re in university now. Everyone around you seems to be forming friend groups, going to parties, joining clubs, and posting stories with new people. Meanwhile, you’re silently wondering how you’re supposed to make friends when you’d rather be chilling in your room than diving into a crowd of strangers.
If this sounds familiar—you’re not alone. Making friends in uni can feel overwhelming, especially if you’re introverted, shy, or just someone who takes time to open up. But guess what? You don’t have to fake being outgoing, join every club, or go to every party just to find your people. You just need the right approach—and a little patience.
This guide is your down-to-earth, pressure-free blueprint for making genuine connections at university, even if talking to new people makes your palms sweat.
First Things First: You’re Not Weird for Finding This Hard
Let’s get this out of the way—there’s nothing wrong with you for struggling to make friends. It’s common, especially in the first few months. People just don’t talk about it. Social media makes it look like everyone has it figured out, but in reality, a lot of people are just as nervous and unsure.
Introverts aren’t antisocial—they’re just wired differently. You might prefer one-on-one chats over big groups, need downtime after socializing, or feel exhausted by small talk. All valid. You can still make meaningful friendships on your terms.
Step 1: Start Small and Consistent
The best way to meet people without overwhelming yourself? Low-pressure consistency.
Instead of throwing yourself into a massive social event, start with small, everyday interactions:
Sit next to someone in your lecture hall and say hi.
Talk to the person you always see in your tutorial group.
Ask someone a casual question before or after class (“Do you know what the assignment is about?” is a classic).
Go to study groups or revision sessions.
These tiny interactions build comfort over time. And if you keep showing up in the same spaces, people start to remember you. Familiarity breeds connection—even if it’s just through shared eye-rolls during 9 a.m. lectures.
Step 2: Use Your Interests as a Shortcut
You don’t have to fake interests to make friends. In fact, the easiest way to find “your people” is to lean into what you already love.
Ask yourself:
What do I enjoy doing in my free time?
Is there a club, society, or meetup related to that?
Can I join a casual Discord group or online uni community?
From book clubs to photography meetups to anime screenings or intramural sports—there’s something for everyone. And guess what? Being around people who already share your interests skips the small talk and gets straight to bonding.
Don’t worry if you’re not a club person. Even study groups, workshops, and volunteering events can open the door to connection without the pressure of constant socializing.
Step 3: Say Yes (Sometimes)
As an introvert, your instinct might be to turn down invitations because they sound tiring. That’s okay—protect your energy. But say yes sometimes, especially if your gut says it’s a good opportunity.
The first time might feel awkward. You might stand around not knowing anyone. But showing up gives you practice. And most importantly—it gives people the chance to know you exist.
You don’t have to stay the whole time. You don’t have to talk to everyone. Just show up, hang out, and see where the night (or the group project) goes.
Over time, you’ll build a network. It won’t happen overnight—but it will happen.
Step 4: Focus on Depth Over Quantity
Uni friendships aren’t a popularity contest. It’s not about how many people you know—it’s about how safe and seen you feel with the people around you.
Introverts tend to prefer fewer but deeper connections. That’s a strength, not a weakness.
When you find someone you click with:
Invite them for coffee after class.
Suggest studying together.
Check in with a message if they miss class.
Share something personal to deepen the bond.
One good friend can change your entire university experience. You don’t need a squad—you just need a solid connection or two.
Step 5: Make Digital Spaces Work for You
Not all friendships have to start IRL. Especially in your first year, joining digital communities can help ease the pressure of face-to-face interaction.
Try:
University subreddits or Discord servers
Group chats for your course
Study apps where people post tips and questions
Posting your thoughts or questions in class forums
Even messaging someone from class to ask about an assignment can lead to a conversation. Don’t overthink it. Everyone’s looking for connection, even if no one’s saying it out loud.
Bonus: if you're using tools like Duetoday AI to transcribe lectures, organize your notes, or generate study guides—you can even invite others to collaborate. Duetoday lets you turn YouTube videos or lecture audio into flashcards, summaries, and quizzes. It’s perfect for creating a small study crew without extra effort. You can share your notes or create a group quiz session, which naturally leads to bonding over shared pain (like that impossible econ topic). It’s free to try and makes you the person everyone wants in their study circle.
Step 6: Be Patient With the Process
Real talk: making friends takes time. Sometimes weeks. Sometimes months. It doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.
The first few weeks of uni often feel awkward, especially if everyone around you seems to be clicking. But those fast friendships often fizzle out. The stronger, deeper ones usually grow slower.
Don’t rush it. Don’t force it. And don’t panic if your social life doesn’t look perfect yet.
Give it time. Keep showing up. Keep talking to people. Keep putting yourself gently outside your comfort zone.
Step 7: Check in With Yourself (Not Just Others)
In the push to make friends, it’s easy to forget your own needs. Remember:
It’s okay to spend time alone.
It’s okay to leave social events early.
It’s okay to say no to protect your energy.
But also check in with why you’re saying no. Is it because you genuinely need rest—or because fear is holding you back?
Introversion isn’t about hiding—it’s about recharging. Make sure you’re balancing solitude and connection. One feeds the other.
Final Thoughts
You don’t have to become someone else to make friends in uni. You just have to be a little brave, a little open, and a lot patient.
Say hi in class. Join something small. Text someone from your course. Share a meme in the group chat. Little steps build trust. Trust builds connection. And connection builds friendship.
Your people are out there—even if you’re quiet, anxious, or feel like you don’t fit the “university vibe.” You just need to meet them at your own pace.
FAQ
How long does it take to make real friends in uni?
It varies. Some people click in a week, others take months. The key is consistency and showing up—even in small ways.
What if I’m not good at starting conversations?
Start with shared context. “Do you know when this assignment is due?” or “Did you understand that lecture?” are perfect openers.
Can introverts really enjoy group settings?
Yes—with the right group and boundaries. Smaller groups, quieter events, and shared interests help introverts feel more at ease.
What if I feel left out?
You’re not alone. Many students feel this way early on. Focus on finding one or two people, not fitting into every group.
How can I meet people if I don’t party?
Clubs, study groups, student societies, volunteer programs, campus workshops, Discord servers, or even library meetups. Tons of options exist beyond parties.
